1. Good kissers keep it #real.
The #1 must-have for even a semi-deec kiss: You actually want to. If you’re kissing someone only because it feels like what you “should” be doing ~in the moment~ or because you feel weird pressure, then STEP AWAY FROM THE FACE.
2. Good kissers stay fresh.
Would you want to be thisclose to someone’s face space only to find that their mouth smells like the dumpster behind Olive Garden? Kay. If you’re anticipating a trip to MakeoutTown, avoid the stank-inducing foods like garlic, onions, processed Cheetos-like cheese, etc. It’s basic manners.
3. Good kissers Keep Calm and Carry Balm. No one can hate when your gloss game is strong, but actually mashing that onto a human’s face is gross and cruel and no. Bae is probs trying to kiss youractual lips, not your Melon Mango Primer, so stick to that good ol’ neutral lip balm.
4. Good kissers talk it out.
Listen, #aintnobodygottime for bleh makeouts. Expert kissers skip to the good parts by taking control and mentioning the things you dolike (“So, that tongue move you just did. Yasss.”), and show them alternatives to the things you don’t.(“Hey, instead of that … toothy … situation you did with my lip, how about you just graze it gently, like this?”)
5. Good kissers channel the right emojis.
Here’s a list of emojis not to be when kissing:
🐟: Open-mouthed and gasping for dear life.
🐶: How did your tongue get in my nostril?
🐤: Stop pecking at my face ARE MY LIPS SEEDS.
If you’re channeling ANY emoji, it should be Pink Shirt Massaging Her Head: Relax your lips. Relax your life. You’re a hot, awesome human, and this person is lucky (and probably also just as nervous) to be kissing You. Collect your chills andrelax. 💆
6. Good kissers move ~like you’re my miiiirrror~
- I’m not mad at envisioning J.Timbs when kissing anyone, and
- Bomb-dot-com kisses are a mirror dance — meaning, mimic: Slow down, take note of the things bae does, and gently do it back. Bust out moves you’d want them to do to you. Remember that the show’s not all about you: You’re both in control of this dance.
7. Good kissers know: Less is EVERYTHING.
Thinking too hard about going for some ~sexy trick~ you learned is how makeout seshes end up feeling like dental cleaning. Pro kissers know to start off small and slow, and to only #turnup if you feel like it’s right. Oh, you’ll know.
8. Good kissers ARE ANTI-HICKEY.
Question: Who thought it’d be sexy to literally be a mouth vacuum? Oh, no one? GREAT — then we’re officially retiring The Hickey. Be nice to Bae’s neck: Small kisses down from the jaw or gentle lip-brushes FTW.
9. Good kissers know that lips-only are for basics.
💋Under the jawbone.
💋Soft spot behind the earlobe.
💋The UGH-so-cute little dip in the collarbone.
💋Tip of the nose.
💋Inside the wrist.
💋Forehead. 💋Shoulder. 💋CLOSED EYELID. #THEPOSSIBILITIES.
Give the both of you a second to mouth-breathe again and freakin’ explore!
10. Good kissers take the long route.
Consider this a Google Maps for your meggouts:
- Start at the lips, kissing (NO TONGUE) gently down towards the chin, then all along the jawbone, towards the ear. From here, give their earlobe a little nip, or whisper softly … “So when are we getting Chipotle?” (Optional.)
- Sneak up on bae from behind and kiss from the top of their shoulder, along the curve towards their ear. (And again, The Optional Whisper: “I want to eat an entire pizza with you.”)
- Gently kiss down the forehead, starting at the hairline, along the slope of the nose, ending at the lips. Congrats: You’re now so goddamn cute.
11. Good kissers can make PDA not-obnoxious.
Bae will def appreciate the sneak-attack smooch:
💥Facing each other on the bus? BOOM, tip-of-the-nose.
💥Approaching them while they’re sitting? BOOM, forehead.
💥Strolling along, holding hands? BOOM, knuckle-peck.
💥Are you vertically challenged and only come up to their shoulder? BOOM, shoulder smooch.
💥Lounging con Netflix? BOOM, inside-of-the-wrist lip-graze. (Careful.Tickles.)
12. Good kisser can keep their tongue in check.
First Rule of Tongue: USE SPARINGLY. Start off by just findingtheir tongue with the tip of yours — almost like a gentle tongue fist-bump — then pull back. Try grazing past the tip of their tongue — then pull back. Circle the tip of their tongue — then pull back. (Drool and breath and blegh happens when you don’t pull back.)
When you’re feeling up for it, you can try running your tongue just along the inside of their upper lip, or pull a quick lick under their top lip in a sort of come-here/teeny-ice-cream-cone maneuver.
13. Good kissers don’t nibble. Anything. EVER.
I’m sorry — the thought of someone “nibbling” on my lip the way I legitimately nibble on straws and pen caps and beef jerky GIVES ME THE ABSOLUTE FEAR. Why do we still tell each other to nibble?! Good teeth action starts with taking bae’s bottom lip between your front teeth, giving agentle tug, and letting go.
14. Good kissers play with the pre-game.
Before kissing, lean in and swipe your lips past theirs, slowly and lightly, then pull back. Take a one-two pause to bask in Bae’s “OMG WTF I NEED YOUR FACE” reaction before going in for the kill. And for those feeling sass-tastic: If you’ve taken a break and are getting ready to lean back in, build up some anticipation by pulling back a half-inch and smiling, like “Not yet, sucker — Deal With It.” Proceed with makeout as scheduled. #sorryneversorry
15. “But what do I do with my hands?!” you ask.
👋Both on either side of their head — with plans to slide back into their hair.
👋One on their lower back, and one behind the neck (can also venture into Hair Land).
👋Both hands lightly resting on their chest.
👋Both hands on hips, which can sneak around their lower back tosqueeze.
👋One hand taking a selfie. (JK – just making sure you’re still paying attention.) (But we’d be super impressed if you could pull it off, JS.)
👋One or both hands pulling on the neck of their shirt a little bit, towards you.
👋A few fingers up and down their spine, down the nape of their neck, or hovering around their cheeks and jaw.
16. Good kissers can manage bad kissers like a pro.
Pause an aggressive kisser by leaning back, putting a hand gently on their collarbone, and approaching v e r y s l o w l y — almost like saying, “Chill. Take it down 4 notches. Like this.” Reroute an overly acrobatic kisser by pulling back, just enough so you can whisper, and say, “I like kissing you likethis.” Proceed with what you’d want done to you. (Pray that they’ve read this article and know how to mirror.)
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